Ch-Ch-Changes
Tonight one of my close friends send me a link to her new blog and to be honest, I was shocked my what she had to say. She talked about how much her first year of college changed her and just reading her blog, I knew that she was right. This year I had so many different feelings about the change that she talked about. In some ways, I liked watching my friends change and mature and come to terms with the people they really are. But in other ways, it was hard watching them go and make new friends to replace me. I know that sounds selfish, but I'm sure I'm not the only one that feels that way. Either way, I'm happy to see that after freshman year many of my friends have changed for the better and I still love hanging out with them. Of course, my friends weren't the only ones that changed this year.
I know that I changed a lot too. And I'm hoping it was for the better. I went into college in something that could be considered a relationship but wasn't really because I had a fear of commitment. As I struggled with wanting to stay with that person, I had a hard time making friends because I was still so obsessed with home. I mean, high school was like the best time of my life and I missed my friends and just wanted everything to go back to normal. After that relationship ended, I made some changes in myself. While some parts of me stayed the same, like the part that pushed people away when all I really needed was a shoulder to cry on, other parts of me got stronger and realized that I could do this and it was up to me to make the most of everything I could up at school. It was still hard for awhile, but it felt so good to finally be able to go home and say to that person that I didn't need them. Of course we'll always be good friends and he did help show me a lot about myself, I just don't need him to be there for me 24-7. That whole experience helped me mature and while it sucked, I knew that everyone had to go through it at some point. And I was glad that my experience was able to help me help my roomie with her boy troubles as well.
On that same note, I am seriously so blessed to have been put with my roommate. She has taught me so much about life and myself. She has helped to keep me on the ground this past year and remind me of what is really important in life. And whether she knows it or not, she helped me realize the importance of having someone in your life that you can just vent to-which we did a lot of in our room. And even though, her boy situation wasn't exactly ideal either, she made the best of it and was able to show me how incredibly strong she is. She's the type of person who is able to walk into a room and the whole room instantly lights up. She's able to talk to anyone and I strive to be like her. I am so blessed to have a roomie like Mary who helps me appreciate life and keeps it real all at the same time.
It's a good thing I had Mary because I was bitter about my friends moving on and getting new friends, but now I realize they are just moving on with their lives and the ones that actually want to be in my life will make an effort to be there. I'm doing all I can-and I'm okay with that.
On a totally different note, one of my favorite changes, was the decision I made to start living a healthier lifestyle. I would do my best to wake up everyday and get to the gym. Some mornings it was tough but it was so SO worth it. And when I started watching what I ate, I felt tons better about myself. I've never really liked my body, but once I started working hard I gained this confidence that I never even knew existed. I am so happy that I was able to make that change because I honestly feel 12 million times better when I wake up in the morning and like how I look!
It's insane how much can change in a year. And when you take a step back you're able to see everything-including the changes in yourself. I was so blessed to watch my friends grow and I can't wait to continue to grow myself as we go through these next few years. Thanks again BKK for inspiring me to take a look at what this year did for me.
I know that I changed a lot too. And I'm hoping it was for the better. I went into college in something that could be considered a relationship but wasn't really because I had a fear of commitment. As I struggled with wanting to stay with that person, I had a hard time making friends because I was still so obsessed with home. I mean, high school was like the best time of my life and I missed my friends and just wanted everything to go back to normal. After that relationship ended, I made some changes in myself. While some parts of me stayed the same, like the part that pushed people away when all I really needed was a shoulder to cry on, other parts of me got stronger and realized that I could do this and it was up to me to make the most of everything I could up at school. It was still hard for awhile, but it felt so good to finally be able to go home and say to that person that I didn't need them. Of course we'll always be good friends and he did help show me a lot about myself, I just don't need him to be there for me 24-7. That whole experience helped me mature and while it sucked, I knew that everyone had to go through it at some point. And I was glad that my experience was able to help me help my roomie with her boy troubles as well.
On that same note, I am seriously so blessed to have been put with my roommate. She has taught me so much about life and myself. She has helped to keep me on the ground this past year and remind me of what is really important in life. And whether she knows it or not, she helped me realize the importance of having someone in your life that you can just vent to-which we did a lot of in our room. And even though, her boy situation wasn't exactly ideal either, she made the best of it and was able to show me how incredibly strong she is. She's the type of person who is able to walk into a room and the whole room instantly lights up. She's able to talk to anyone and I strive to be like her. I am so blessed to have a roomie like Mary who helps me appreciate life and keeps it real all at the same time.
It's a good thing I had Mary because I was bitter about my friends moving on and getting new friends, but now I realize they are just moving on with their lives and the ones that actually want to be in my life will make an effort to be there. I'm doing all I can-and I'm okay with that.
On a totally different note, one of my favorite changes, was the decision I made to start living a healthier lifestyle. I would do my best to wake up everyday and get to the gym. Some mornings it was tough but it was so SO worth it. And when I started watching what I ate, I felt tons better about myself. I've never really liked my body, but once I started working hard I gained this confidence that I never even knew existed. I am so happy that I was able to make that change because I honestly feel 12 million times better when I wake up in the morning and like how I look!
It's insane how much can change in a year. And when you take a step back you're able to see everything-including the changes in yourself. I was so blessed to watch my friends grow and I can't wait to continue to grow myself as we go through these next few years. Thanks again BKK for inspiring me to take a look at what this year did for me.
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